Teaching Kids about the Domination Culture

A Harvard study of 10,000 middle and high-school age youth across all income levels and ethnic backgrounds between 2013 and 2014 discovered that children are taught to value personal success and happiness over caring.  http://sites.gse.harvard.edu/sites/default/files/making-caring-common/files/mcc_the_children_we_mean_to_raise_4.pdf

Of those studied, 75% said they valued personal success over being kind.  More telling is that  80% said their parents emphasized personal success over being kind and over happiness.  The prevalent rhetoric which bemoans bullying, disrespect and unkind behavior is obviously not convincing our children, who are learning largely selfish notions of success.

The Harvard study seems to treat success caring and happiness as mutually exclusive values as it asks young people to rank them.  Success and caring are not necessarily separate, but statistics back up the finding that success is valued at the expense of caring.

Half of high school students admit to cheating on a test and nearly 75% admit to copying someone else’s homework (Josephson Institute, 2012). Nearly 30% of middle and high school students reported being bullied during the 2010-2011 school year (NCES, 2013). In that same year, over half of girls in grades 7-12 reported at least one episode of sexual harassment at school (Hill & Kearl, 2011).

These values stress children, encourage them to harm each other psychologically and promote a depressing and dysfunctional world view in which most people cannot win.  The predominance of evidence actually indicates that our survival depends on collaboration and caring, (See The Bond, by Lynne McTaggart) but without believing and living it, parents cannot promote the value of civility to their children.

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