Being the Stalker Instead of Being Stalked

Those who are in relationship with critics or controllers can develop the habit of reacting to events but avoiding positive action.  Being reactive will save your skin when you under attack of any kind, but being reactive is not so useful for getting whatyou want out of life, and it narrows your horizons until your goal is simply to get by.

If you are a student of popular new age metaphysics, this reactivity is reinforced by the notions of using the power of thought and being open to receive.  These ideas can be powerful, but not without the magic of inspired action!

When the subconscious mind is full of limitations and receiving is limited to the next criticism or argument, action becomes reactive instead of inspired.  Getting away from trouble will probably not lead toward fulfilled desires.

If this becomes habitual, you are the stalked, not the stalker. Here are a few exercises you can try to get into stalking mode and actively or proactively seeking rather than reacting.

When religious evangelists come to the door, asking if you ever think about the afterlife, tell them you definitely do!  Greet them enthusiastically and invite them to your church.  Keep a church bulletin handy to press into their hands and tell them you hope to see them this Sunday.  Of course, most of these groups are not allowed to take material from other churches.

Is there someone in your family who frequently asks you for money or loans or favors?  Pick up the phone now, dial them and ask them for $50 until payday or see if they will commit to helping you clean the gutters.  Of course, unlike you, they’ll probably have plenty of excuses handy for why they can’t help you out.

Next time you see a panhandler in front of the post office, approach him or her and ask for a quarter for your parking meter so you won’t get a ticket.  Of course, they won’t have any spare change, though they were hoping you did.

Who knows?  If you try these activities, you could get some money or help or have new guests at church.  My guess is you’ll simply discover that even the panhandler has better boundaries than people who live with critics or controllers.

The more important gift will be to have some practice at pursuing instead of avoiding.  You may even find yourself going after more important desires… or telling your critic to stuff it.

You are now the stalker.

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